A Word to Car Drivers

Listen, car drivers kill us motorcyclists and scooter riders all the time by pulling out in front of us.

Because of this, please cut us a little slack when we’re wary around you.

To the guy pulling out of the gas station this morning: there you were, squinting into the sun, shielding your eyes with your hand. I was coming from the direction of the sun. You (of course) had no turn signal on, but I surmised you were about to turn left – from the great US turn signal.
The US turn signal, incidentally, is the two round black rubber things at the front of your car which can often – but not always – be relied upon to be pointing in the general direction you intend to turn. That’s all you’ve given me to work with… I’m sorry.

The trouble is, not only are we left to ascertain your intended direction from the two black rubber things, those are also the things we are intently watching to see if you’re moving. If you never actually let those things stop, how are we supposed to know you have seen us, and are not in the process of pulling out in front of us?

I’m sorry but, try as I may, I cannot perfect my powers of telepathy and, frankly, I don’t trust you. There, I’ve said it.

Yelling at me because you don’t like the speed and hesitancy with which I’m passing you doesn’t help. Here’s what will: STOP YOUR DAMN WHEELS TURNING!

I’m sorry to mess up your perfectly timed fly-by manoeuvre to smoothly pass the rear of my bike as I clear your path, but to take part in such a manoeuvre, I would really like some advance warning and, preferably, some practise with the vehicles involved.
The Red Arrows and the Blue Angels get to practise such manoeuvres. We haven’t had a chance yet. Forgive my irresolution.

Exactly one mile further on my journey (and again one mile further on), I encounter another manoeuvre which always makes my day special: I’m riding down a highway with two lanes going my direction, and you’re about to join the road.
YOU may know what lane you’re aiming for when you pull out in front of me, but, unfortunately, I don’t (another victim of my less-than-stellar telepathic prowess).

YOU may be perfectly confident that everything is going to be OK because you’re aiming for the lane I’m not occupying but, sadly, I have no way of knowing.

Would it be too much to ask to have somewhat more than 30 milliseconds to work out which lane you’ve chosen? Because, guess what? I have to react as if you have chosen mine.
Sorry, I need more than 30 milliseconds. Here’s an idea though: WAIT UNTIL THE DAMN ROAD IS ACTUALLY CLEAR BEFORE YOU PULL OUT – AND THAT MEANS ALL LANES!

Once again, my deepest apologies for having such poor telephathic abilitlies, but it’s all I have.
Maybe in another life, those abilities may have improved, but I’m in no particular hurry to end this one to see. I’d rather not have your help in that regard.

Thank you for your attention, but I won’t hold my breath…

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2 thoughts on “A Word to Car Drivers

  1. I have a few observations from “A Word to Car Drivers” that makes me reply.
    I often wonder if drivers of 4 wheelers are just too busy in the cockpit to take the time to push that little lever to notify others the anticipation of a turn. Maybe the recent driver training courses are teaching now. “Turn Indicators are Optional”.
    Thank goodness for brake lights that still illuminates when ones foot exerts pressure on the brake. At least you know the vehicle in front of you is slowing to do something, but it makes me wonder if the driver thoughts are so unorganized that they decide milliseconds before it needs to happen.
    Heaven forbid they have to tell the person they are talking to on the phone, “will you mind holding on for a second, I need to signal I am making a turn”. Maybe there is some Sci-Fi Technology in the works where the owners brain will pair to the vehicles dash and it will do this for them. Some vehicles park themselves for you, so why not pick up on the need for a turn ahead..
    Seriously speaking, I love technology…
    I am just as guilty as the next guy, but being both a driver of 2 and 4 wheels, I take the time to communicate. I probably drove my 4 wheeler just as bad, but it was not until I was involved with 2 wheelers that I understand what they go through and the risks they take to avoid the other drivers. I now am a better driver all around.
    Oh, for those of you that need to replace your burnt bulbs in your vehicles. Please change them! Do you realize when you depress your brake and one light is out, it looks like you are making a turn!

  2. whew rant on brutha! get it all outta your system. valid points all around. cars drive around like it’s their right to be anywhere on the road and your obligation to get out of their way (whoever you may be – two, three, or four wheels). As society deteriorates so does the quality of our average drivers. It won’t be getting any better either.

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